Humble yourself, chile.

Girl, let me you tell you… God will bring you to a point where you have no choice but to put your pride aside. Girl, I didn't realize how much pride I had. I've come to a place in my life that I don't want people to continue to treat me any ol' kind of way. I've been speaking up for myself in ways I haven’t before. But, in the midst of that, I gotta learn how to show God's glory too... Didn't realize I wasn't lol.

A few years ago, I heard one of my elders say, "offense happens from the listener's perspective." So, when I heard it, I thought that he had a very good point. You can say whatever you want to say in a nice tone, or respectful way but all the listener will hear, is the message. If they realize that what they've heard doesn't align with their liking, then they'll become offended.

Recently, I've had to pour out my feelings to a loved one and they just could not accept the fact their actions made me feel some type of way. Although they may not be responsible for how I perceived it, I felt they could have at least acknowledged it. I just wanted there to be some type of understanding. But they couldn't bring themselves down enough to see where I was coming from or how I felt. It left me feeling unloved or unheard. I was turned off. I felt the relationship was one-sided because apparently, my feelings did not matter.

Now here I am, speaking my peace (to someone else) and I apparently have offended them because they didn't like what I said. They felt I was being disrespectful, and I could have found another way to say it. But I knew within my heart, I wasn't being disrespectful because I am not a disrespectful person; especially to whom I was speaking to. But that's the way they perceived it in their mind. So what did the Lord tell me to do??! He said, “humble yourself". That's all I kept hearing. I didn't understand it. I said, "it sounds counterintuitive." LOL smh. But this was a teaching moment for me. I had a choice to focus on the fact that they thought I was being disrespectful or show God's love. Arguing about feelings is not the point.

So, I realized there's another side to what my elder said. Even though offense may be taken from the listener's perspective, as Christians we want to show the love of Christ also. And if what I've done or said has offended you, then let me make sure that you can understand what I was trying to say, instead of focusing on the offense; because although you may not have liked what I said, what I said is still valid. We both want to be heard.

"When pride cometh, then cometh shame: but with the lowly is wisdom" Proverbs 11:2 KJV. Meaning, pride leads to disgrace, away from God's grace; but humility leads to wisdom. If I wasn't able to humble myself, I wouldn't have been able to see the lesson or even the comparison between both situations. I had the opportunity to be on both sides of the same issue. I wanted to act as if I wasn't wrong…and I'm not saying I was but what would have that served me? That person would still be feeling some type of way and that could cause more blockage in our relationship. I'm on the path to be Godlier. So, if humbling myself is the best thing to do, then so be it.